Problems with strip club drunks

you handled that perfectly

I've had belligerent drunks start shit, but none who had the balls to grab me and try (I say try because that's about as far as it would go) to drag me anywhere. I don't know how big or old you are Doc but he obviously felt like he could get away with it for some reason. Next time don't let him lay his hands on you at all. IME belligerent drunks usually lose their alcohol induced bravery the moment it looks like the other guy will fight back.

A few times, yes. However one of the perks of living in seattle is that everyone is so standoffish strangers normally don’t speak to one another in clubs/bars. So if the guy 2 tables away is drunk I never know about it.

A couple of months ago I was in a small Wyoming town and decided to go check out a local strip club around 6pm. I drove out and first did a drive-by to see what it looked like. On the first pass, I saw a couple of Harleys and a couple of rough looking guys standing outside near the door smoking. I drove around the block and decided, "what the hell", let's give it a try. I walked in and there was a square bar with the sides filled up but mostly empty right in front of me. I took a seat at the bar and watched what was going on. It was a small bar in a small town so it was all locals and no dancers had hit the stage yet. Well, much to my luck the 2 dudes outside walk in and proceed to sit at 2 drinks right next to me. The one who sat next to me was the bigger and uglier of the two. He was wasted and loud. I basically ignored him until I ordered another beer and he said he was buying it loudly to the hot bartender. I said thanks and he yelled at me "because I said so!" I guess he thought I asked why. I said thanks again and he mumbled something like you better be thankful. I stayed about another 30 minutes while he went and annoyed all the customers and dancers around the bar. Even his friend that he was smoking outside with suggested to the bartender that he should be kicked out right in front of him. He kind of got sheepish and asked if he was going to get kicked out. The bartender said no so he took out another few hundred dollar advance on his credit card. About that time, I figured it was best to cut my losses after a few beers and find dinner. I left and went across the street to dinner. In the end, he was gruff and tough looking but he was just a dumb ass drunk. We can all escalate things if we get confrontational back but it's usually not worth proving you are more of a man than the drunk asshole. They are easily distracted so they will focus on something else when they get bored with you.

Why would you do what a drunk guy jn a club tells you to? Man up. I've had drunk guys ask me to buy them a drink. I just ask then to buy the first round and that gets rid of them. Depending on the conversation I either humor drunks or tell them to fuck off. I've also had good experiences. Drunk guys offering me drinks. Good conversations. Drunks buying me dances. Asking me to join their group. It just depends. People don't usually fuck with me though. It's about how you carry yourself

Funny the toughest guys here won't meet another TUSCLer cause they don't have a keyboard to defend themselves with, OP did fine, the bouncers did what they were supposed to, and you didn't get hurt,

I had a drunk guy from a bachelor party adopt that weird friendly-yet-aggressive stance that is relatively common amongst drunk guys who only go to strip clubs for bachelor parties. Anyway, he was heading away from friendly towards physically aggressive, and I had a feeling that if I didn't address it head on then things would go badly. So, I firmly told him that it really wouldn't matter who was the tougher guy, if we kept on our current path then we'd both get thrown out of the club. And I asked him if he really wanted to be the guy who got his buddy's entire bachelor party thrown out of a strip club. And then I told him that we were both there to have a good time, but we should probably do that apart from each other. He grumbled something in response and staggered away. The bartender (who had been quietly clocking our entire interaction) thanked me for de-escalating the situation without causing a fuss. Anyway, they got thrown out about a half hour later because another guy in the same party got in a shoving match with a customer. At least it wasn't me.

I think this is mostly a matter of luck -- the thing with drunks is, their judgement is badly skewed and they have fewer inhibitions, so I don't agree that someone has done something wrong (other than wrong time wrong place) to have a bad encounter with a drunk. Perhaps if you're 6'4" 250, even a drunk won't mess with you, otherwise I've seen drunks mess with all kinds of people who any sober person knows they shouldn't have. I've been lucky enough not to have a bad encounter with a drunk in the SC, at least that I could remember. But for the most part I'm going to uncrowded dayshifts where a belligerent or obnoxious drunks stands out like a sore thumb, and the bouncers find those guys fast. I've had benign encounters at the bar, there's a couple of club regulars in the clubs I go to, who just sit at the bar and buy the strippers drinks. I've ended up getting absorbed into the group and he buys us all (including me) a round, and then I do the same back. I am not looking to get into physical encounters with patrons when I'm off SCing, but pulling on my arm would be a red line for me. I likely would start by trying to verbally re-direct him (this works often and easily with drunks) while wiping his hand off me, but in the end wouldn't abide him grabbing me and pulling, period, so if that didn't work I'd do something else (no need for violence yet, maybe just stand up and walk to the bouncer and ask him to handle it, another side benefit of being on great terms with the bouncers). That said, just a boundary for me, and OP got out unscathed so there you go.

Yes, glad it worked out and this guy didn't cause you any real trouble, but I do agree with rickdugan. I have a degree of tolerance for drunks that don't realize what they're doing, but put a fucking hand on me and they're gonna get a wake-up call real quick. Used to be a regular at a dive club which is unfortunately now closed. I knew everyone, bartenders, girls, owner, bouncer and, at least by sight a few other regular customers. So this shit-faced moron is sitting one stool away from me. He's leaning over in my direction commenting about the girls and trying to get me to agree with him or conversate in some way. At first I'm like, "yeah right, whatever dude" but eventually I just ignored him completely. He got frustrated so he moves to the stool right next to me and continues the same bullshit. I told him, "Hey man, I'm watching the show. Don't wanna talk." Then he decides to poke me in the shoulder which I refuse to ignore. I grabbed his wrist and told him to shut up or I'd punch him in the fucking face. Asshole moves back to his original seat and now he's trying to apologize, all slurring his words like a drunken idiot. Then I hear him telling the bartender he wants to buy me a drink. I stood up and told him forget it and he should just move to the other side of the bar. He took one look at the pissed off guys sitting over there and finally made the good decision to walk out the door.

He probably thought you were cute.

I'm a big guy with major fuck-you-don't-talk-to-me vibes. And much more a day shifter so fewer drunks.

===> "Funny the toughest guys here won't meet another TUSCLer cause they don't have a keyboard to defend themselves with, OP did fine, the bouncers did what they were supposed to, and you didn't get hurt," +1 on the part about not getting hurt, especially if he's an old man. But he's lucky that there were bouncers to intervene so quickly. In some clubs that wouldn't have been the case. Strip clubs are not the ballet. On any given night there is the potential for trouble - I've certainly had my share of those nights. Rule number 1 in any potential fight is to never let him lay his hands on you. It allows him to restrict your movements, making you more vulnerable, while emboldening him at the same time.

^ Well maybe that's on you, I've been in many clubs over many years no one has ever put their hands on me and it's quite simple to avoid trouble, but please spare me the tough guy routine, no matter how tough you think you are there's always someone tougher, smarter, faster, and believe me on one thing, avoiding trouble doesn't diminish you one iota, problem here is you guys that get into bar fights don't really know how to handle yourself or you wouldn't get into a bar fight.

You have to be careful because you never know when a "happy drunk" can turn violent. If you can, distance yourself as soon as possible. Don't take a chance. Humor a "happy drunk" as a last resort. I was sitting at the tipping rail and a "happy drunk" sat next to me with some of his friends. He began laughing and making loud obnoxious comments about the dancers. He never said anything to me, but his behavior made me feel uncomfortable. I should have moved, but didn't and learned my lesson. Without warning he grabbed a dancer and she screamed. A bouncer came running over and now I couldn't move to get out of the way. The bouncer leaned over the "happy drunk" and he very quickly stood up with the bouncer on his back and threw the bouncer against a wall. Still laughing, he turned to me pointed to his biceps and said, "Now you know why they call me Popeye." He could have broken me in half. It all happened very quickly. His friends came over and they left.

Many years ago, I was part of a bachelor party at the Foxy Lady Brockton (now Boardroom Cabaret). The groom was shitfaced and weighed less than my leg, but that didn't stop him from picking a fight with a N.E. Patriots linebacker (I forget the name) along with several of his linebacker-sized friends. Anyway, we decided to save the bouncers some time and the groom's life and threw ourselves out. Not our proudest moment, by far.

#WiseToo That is part and parcel of knowing how to handle yourself, you at least are intelligent enough to realize you should have moved, damn boys there's always some one tougher it's not always obvious by their appearance, as a youngster growing up in Brooklyn I learned how to avoid trouble that has served me well all my life.

You let a man pull you like a rag doll by your arm? I’m disappointed tbh

Rick, I'm kinda confused by your comments in this thread suggesting you would have escalated the situation. I figured you would sheepishly ask him to leave you alone because you are the sole care giver to two nearly grown children and can't afford to get into any trouble. Maybe I read that Daddillac thread wrong.

When I read the OP, I couldn’t remember a specific instance; but as I read thru the thread it jogged my PL-memory: 1) early-2000s in Arlington, TX (west of Dallas) while I lived/SCed in Dallas - was at Chicas Locas Fare Arlington which I believe back then just went by The Fare (this was when Arlington had close to 10 SCs b/f the city shut almost all of them down circa 2010 and for w/e reason this one has survived) – club was blue-collar – it wasn’t one of my go-to clubs but I’d check it out 2 or 3x per year to see how it was – arrived on a weekend eve ~10pm and sat at a hightop by a wall near the main-room entrance/exit – been there about 10-minutes when some dude (mid-20s) that had a “career criminal” vibe to him approaches me (he had dark hair so IDK if he was white/Anglo or 2nd-generation+ Hispanic but he spoke perfect English like someone born in the U.S.) – he approaches me and speaks to me in some drug-slang I couldn’t understand and said something along the lines “you wanna do X” (can’t remember the drug-slang he used) – I just looked at him w/ a blank-stare mainly out-of-confusion b/c (1) I didn’t know what he was trying to say; (2) I had just arrived at the club and was trying to get my bearings and this random guy just approaches me out of the blue – so I just look at him w/ a confused-look in my face and a couple of seconds later his friend shows up and kinda sees his friend trying to talk to me and me looking at his friend like a deer-in-the-headlights – his friend knew his friend was wasted and that I didn’t understand what his wasted-friend was saying and he just told his wasted friend “let’s go” – his wasted friend then aggressively shook my hand and he had this huge-hand that felt like cement – he was an above-avg size-guy: I’d guesstimate 6’1 or-so and maybe 210-lbs or-so so not necessarily “huge” but he looked like one of those naturally-strong/big-boned type people especially when he aggressively shook my hand which I thought he was gonna do damage-to with how-hard he shook it – no-doubt he was blitzed on-something-strong and he def looked “rough around the edges” to put it mildly, he def looked like a professional-criminal – it kinda left me shook for a minute-or-two after he left b/c this guy was pretty-erratic and after he shook my hand I could he was pretty-strong; but he was on his way out (probably to do some drugs) when he approached me and he left the club after his buddy told him “let’s go” and I went about enjoying my SC-visit 2) in a black-Miami-dive circa 2015 at Club Climaxxx (not sure if it was Climaxxx at the time or the former Club Lexx) – small dive w/ mostly barside floor-dances but had a small “lap dance” area in a corner behind a half-wall that offered “semi-privacy” – I had been to this club plenty of times and although usually got my dances barside, sometimes I’d get some dances in the LD-area – often times the LD-areas was empty or maybe another couple in there – the LD-area was in a corner and kinda narrow tucked in b/w a half-wall and the building exterior wall – it was a late-afternoon ~6pm and I had gone to the LD-area w/ a slim-thick early-20s brown-skinned ebony that had great natural-Ds so I had headed to the semi-private LD-area to better enjoy her chocolate-Ds – unfortunately a group of about 5 AA-guys had paid to use the LD-area as their personal bottle-service area but at first I didn’t know that and I just thought they were hanging there for w/e reason – me and the dancer head to the far-end of the narrow area and get our dances – when we finish we start walking to the other end to exit the LD-area but one of the AA-guys was standing in the way w/ his back to us and we couldn’t get thru – one of the other AA-guys in the group noticed we were trying to get thru and told the guy blocking the path “hey someone’s trying to get thru” – the AA-guy blocking the path turns around and say “go go go” so my dancer passes then I walk past him behind her – as I’m walking past him he put his hand in the back of my neck and pushes me – he was def drunk – they seemed like out-of-towners and seemed they’d been drinking for a while maybe even b/f getting to the club – anyway he puts his hand in the back of my neck and pushes me – I swing my arm as I’m walking past and hit his forearm and knock his hand away and I kept walking – the ebony-dancer then walks up to me a few-minutes later on the floor and she’s pissed and says “I can’t believe what that motherfucker did to you” – I was mildly annoyed but could tell the guy was drunk and nothing happened after I slapped his arm away 3) another Miami black dive (Trap Lounge; been closed about 2 years) – this was a dive-of-dives; only beer-and-wine sold and not even napkins available at the bar – small run-down club – just a pool-table and a bar with a stage inside the bar and dances barside – it was the prototypical dive-bar-with-naked-chicks more than a strip-club; but it was UHM+ (many of the girls would fuck you right at the bar while giving you barside “dances”) – a voluptuous yellowbone I had known for a couple of years that I would almost-always get “dances” with was standing by me at the bar while I was sitting in the barstool – a wiry dark-skinned blackguy comes and stands by the bar on the other side of her and is looking at her w/ a weird-look – I didn’t think much of it then 5-seconds later he suddenly grabs her hard by the forearm and tries to pull her to the floor – it happened so fast and unexpected that I didn’t have time to think and jumped out of my barstool and stood b/w her and him face-to-face – blackguy starts yapping “you wanna get fucked-up” but I stand my ground and I’m ready for something to go down – again this happened in-the-blink-of-an-eye and it was just a reflex-reaction/instinct on my part vs more of a deliberate act on my part – I really don’t know why I reacted that way since it was just a reflex-reaction – I assume it was in part b/c I kinda freaked-out and thought she was in eminent-danger and I just reacted – and part of it was maybe that I subconsciously took-it as if he was in part fucking w/ me by fucking w/ the dancer I was with – anyway as we are there face-to-face the dancer gets b/w us and then the dance-counter; an older AA-guy in his 50s, comes running and tells the dancer “Mocha control your man – control your man” (this older AA-guy was the only staff in this dive along w/ a female bartender; so basically no-bouncers/security) – anyway the guy leaves and that was the end of it – a couple of weeks later I’m back at the club and the dancer is there and it turns out it was her BF/babydaddy that had been at the club for a while and was drunk-AF and obviously was a hood-guy – she then tells me she was worried that he was gonna walk back in the club that night and was worried b/c he carried a machete in the car – I thought to myself “well damn”

Like most people, I tend to give a little slack to someone I can tell is drunk and I will try to be patient – but if someone tries to aggressively put their hands on me it’s a crapshoot how I’ll react – these days that I’m older (51) I’ll likely try harder to defuse the situation by maybe smiling and nodding my head “no” and saying something like “don’t do that”; but if I can’t defuse it, meaning he keeps trying to aggressively put his hands on me then I’ll def put a stop to it but while still using the min amount of force possible to get his hands off of me and won't let him touch me again.

I believe the OP has previously mentioned he's 65 ys/o - there def comes a time when one's age and/or health means one "has to take the high-road" but I don't think I would ever allow someone to grab me by the arm and take me to the stage - likely the OP was trying to avoid a situation and was giving the guy extra-slack

Never had a significant incident with a stranger. Only twice and it was with the drunks I came to the club with which is why I almost always club alone. Incident #1 - Penthouse Detroit when it was a thing. Friend is a large former football player and drunk. He pulls a DJT move and literally grabs a girl walking near us by the pussy. She is infuriated and I de-escalate the situation by getting her drinks and going VIP with her (she was a tall big boobed beauty). Incident #2 - Penthouse Detroit when it was a thing. Go there with two people in my business. One borrows money from me after going VIP after coming up short. Afterwards the bouncer who knows me tells me he threw up in VIP/Garbage/Bathroom and has to leave. I handle it and get him out of there after tipping the bouncer. Life lesson for me is don't be responsible for anyone else in a strip club. Fly solo for a smooth flight.

I was standing near the entrance with a stripper A and her husband. (Off-duty) stripper B was there with her boyfriend, they had just been told they couldn't go in the club, the boyfriend was ranting about it. Stripper A was smiling cause we had a good time in the club, so he started ranting at her, asking what are you laughing at bitch. She tried to calm him down, but eventually got tired of being called a bitch, and called him a nigger. He of course got even more hot, so her husband got in his face. Suddenly, Stripper B charged Stripper A, so I had to shot out an arm to block her. I must have weighed more than twice what she did, but I barely kept my balance. Rantboy then came over and got in my face. I was bigger than him, but he was younger and looked the type to be strapped. I always one to walk away from shit, but it wasn't looking like I'd have that option. Fortunately, his friends were cool, don't know why they were hanging with those two ass clowns, they got rantboy to calm down. Stripper A's husband was badass, I'm sure be would have jumped rantboy if he had jumped me, but he wasn't packing.

===> "I've been in many clubs over many years no one has ever put their hands on me and it's quite simple to avoid trouble, but please spare me the tough guy routine, no matter how tough you think you are there's always someone tougher, smarter, faster, and believe me on one thing, avoiding trouble doesn't diminish you one iota, problem here is you guys that get into bar fights don't really know how to handle yourself or you wouldn't get into a bar fight." It has nothing to do with being a tough guy. His best chance of avoiding trouble was to not let the drunk asshole lay hands on him and drag him to the stage in the first place. It just further emboldened the drunk and sucked the OP further into the rabbit hole. It also decreased whatever chance the OP might have had to move away or defend himself if needed. The sad reality is that drunk assholes often pick on the guys who they believe are least able or willing to defend themselves. And the last part of that comment tells me that you are a sheltered snowflake. Sometimes there is no avoiding a confrontation no matter what you do. And sometimes by looking afraid of a confrontation, you actually invite one (see above about emboldened assholes). After all how many bouncers are going to protect you in the club parking lot? Someone who is concerned about confrontations with drunk assholes might want to pick clubs and times of day more conducive to a calmer atmosphere.

The last time I experienced a belligerent drunk at a strip club. I called an Uber and sent myself home. :-).

@uprightcitizen, I mentioned that in my rules of strip clubbing, you only have as much fun as your least fun friend there. Shit like that is why.

This^^^

Only time I've ever had an "issue" with a drunk at a strip club was something I mentioned recently: place near my house, Friday after work, sitting at the bar, and some dude who was already shit-faced sat down on the stool next to mine. Party foul. First, he started to loudly talk about the "other" bartender (not working yet, but the one who would typically give me free drinks), so I already wasn't thrilled with him. He then loudly (sending a trend here?), starts talking shit about one of the other girls, and at this point I'm just trying to watch the game on above the bar. But the worst part was when he went on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on...........and on and on about fucking crypto. I did my best to not induce anger by just kinda nodding, chuckling, with the occasional"uh huh, sounds good, man", but, being wasted, he didn't take the hint. Dude never touched me, but even worse would have been the impression to the girls that this guy was my buddy. I didn't need to go but I was about to get up to take a leak, just to get up, and then make go out to sit at a table, when he did it first. While he was in there, a Cuban angel rescued me. (Remember that thread about swooping in on a girl as soon as the guy gets up to piss? That's bad. What she did was great!) Had he nudged me or something, I dunno,I probably would have played it off. Had he grabbed my arm in an attempt to walk me to the stage I probably would have just looked at him and said no. And then stood up and done it again. I don't feel like 6'3 is that tall, but it tends to do the trick on its own for the most part. I haven't been in a fight since one random night at a house party in college, when a couple buddies got jumped. But that's because I'm a grown-up, with a job, and a house, and a 401(k). Being annoyed with an asshole isn't self-defense.

Sensing*

^ I think if someone starts droning about crypto, you're entitled to beat their ass.

^^^ And there isn't a jury in the world that would convict you.

If a drunk bothers me in a strip club, I simply leave. Then I wait for him in the parking lot and 2AM him.

>And the last part of that comment tells me that you are a sheltered snowflake. Sometimes there is no avoiding a confrontation no matter what you do. And sometimes by looking afraid of a confrontation, you actually invite one (see above about emboldened assholes). After all how many bouncers are going to protect you in the club parking lot? Someone who is concerned about confrontations with drunk assholes might want to pick clubs and times of day more conducive to a calmer atmosphere.< this coming from the stupid fuck that has picked numerous online fights, then pussied out of them go fuck yourself RickiBoi, you are full of shit and a major asshole. Not surprised you have so many problems with your life, you are a stupid, phony, motherfucker

Once I was at a now closed club in Bloomfield NJ. The club was rough - and it was known to be anything goes in VIP. I’m at the bar, the club is packed, and an old drunken guy tries to sit next to me. He was too drunk to be safe. He put his hand on my shoulder, not to harm me or seem intimidating, but to steady himself to sit on the stool. He gets up a few minutes later, to find the men’s room. As he stands, he grabs a young meat head standing behind us. The young guy is looking for a fight, and he says if the drunk touches him again he will lay him out. As the drunk returns from the men’s room, he touches the meat head again, and the young guy drops him with a single punch to the jaw. It’s a packed club, and now everything gets really odd. The old guy gets picked up and moved out to the sidewalk by the bouncers. The meat head and his buddies are asked to leave immediately. They call the ambulance and then a cop comes in to see the manager. It was an odd night. I stay parked at the bar, and continue to enjoy the show on stage. I wait for the cop to leave the managers office. Generally, if the manager comes out angry and red faced, the cops are happy. The manager emerges later and is cursing everything. He’s old and angry normally - but he’s really annoyed after this settlement with the police!!

“ The club was rough - and it was known to be anything goes in VIP.” Otherwise known as typical Cashman habitat. Ha My stories are pretty similar to everyone else’s. Clubbing by myself and drunken guy gets mad that he and his buddy are occupying a bar area with three seats and I take one since he wasn’t there when I got to the bar. He comes out of bathroom or wherever he was and is irritated and doesn’t like my explanation that it was the last seat at the bar. He tries to annoy me by standing between me and the stage and when I ask him to sit down after he’s done tipping he tells me to tip. Ok. Once another and better seat opened up I moved. Other time some guy had finished dances with a well known extras girl. She came over to hang with me and he got jealous someone was talking to the new love of his life. He also did that overly friendly passive aggressive bullshit but I just played along until he went away. Both times the guys were with less drunk buddies and they were uncomfortable by their friend’s behavior but didn’t do anything. I have no problem de-escalating or walking away, even if it’s someone I could take. There are much better ways to use my testosterone and adrenaline in a strip club than worrying about keeping a tough guy rep. I stick to myself and people generally don’t interfere with me.

I hit a club in Reno not too long ago and almost had an issue with a couple of guys. They were a couple of clearly blue collar guys (which I have no issues with whatsoever!) sitting at the rail throwing ones at very dancer onstage. Finally a woman who’s attention I wanted to get came onstage so I made my way up and tipped her a 5 which lead her my way immediately. They noticed of course and all I hear is “oh sure go to that guy, he doesn’t work for a living” which is true (unless you count sitting in front of a computer all day as work). I just quietly asked the dancer to come see me after and told the guys “you’re 100% correct you work harder than I do” and left the rail.

Drunks don't try shit with me. They're actually really friendly. I've had sober guys try shit when I'm drunk though. Like trying to cut in line at the bathroom. I push them out of the way. I've had guys make rude and racist comments when I had dancers at my table a long time. But I ignore that or stare them down til they leave lulz

"The groom was shitfaced and weighed less than my leg, but that didn't stop him from picking a fight with a N.E. Patriots linebacker (I forget the name) along with several of his linebacker-sized friends."

I experienced something similar when a couple of professional wrestlers came onto the club after the show. Two guys tried to pick a fight by standing behind them while they sat at the bar and began hurling insults such as, "they look like fags" "they're over weight pieces of shit" etc. These guys simply tried to get a physical reaction which would be caught on security cameras and result in a law suit which would most likely have an out of court settlement. They looked at this as an opportunity to make some easy money and have all medical expenses paid too.

JimmyMcNulty - I think you are right. That’s my type of club!

Yeah, unless it's a pretty girl in her underwear dragging me off to the VIP to ravage me, I can't imagine letting anyone drag me anywhere in a club. What the hell were you thinking? Talk about a recipe for getting robbed. Did you check your pockets afterwards to see if he'd lifted anything? Picking pockets is the first thing I'd think of in that situation.