Crazy shit

I few a bicycle once, maybe a 100 feet or more. Broke 2 spokes, had a sore ankle and 1 nut. Talk about one and done.

1) I was drinking a black/tan with a buddy at a bar. I picked up my glass to finish off the last swallow and I heard this "NO NO NO WRONG GLASS!" My buddy was using that glass as a chew spit glass. I kept it down, however, I'm a tad more careful now. Yeah, it was gross, and I still drink black/tans when available. 2) I met this really hot blonde "girl next door" type in college when I was taking CompSci grad classes, she was a CompSci undergrad. I saw she was frustrated with a mainframe program, and I offered to help as I had taken the class a year before. After she finished up, I said, "Are you hungry? Let's get a pizza". She was a tad surprised, and off we went. The next week I took her to a graduation party (this was late May), we hung out for a few hours, then we left. We just started talking so I kept driving. It was dark by now. I had driven to a ski area. We walked up the hill to watch the stars and we had sex on the slope. She became a "part-time" roommate as she was living in a dorm room with a roommate. After a few months she suggested her roommate stay with me, so she did. I never suggested a 3-some, I should have (I was an idiot). She was a bit shy, nothing happened, but we had nice evening and shared my bed. Oh yeah, both were engaged. My thing lasted almost a year when she graduated and got married a year or so later. She was the perfect "girl next door" with a strong sex drive - the guy she married was 150 miles away. This is the only place I have ever mentioned this - EVER.

I used to venture into some rather shady neighborhoods back in my 20’s and 30’s. It’s not like a lot of strip clubs are located in gated communities in the burbs. I’d leave a club at 1 am in search of an ATM - and for some reason a lot of inner city ATM’s weren’t drive up back then - you had to get out of your vehicle. When you’re young and dumb and in search of Pussy, I did stuff I wouldn’t do now.

I don’t drive as fast as I used to. It must be true what they say about drivers under the age of 25–when I was 19 I had a bunch of friends in my car and I was driving on the roads in our local park. The roads were narrow, winding along the edge of a lake, trees obscuring the view of what was up ahead around the bend in the road. I must have been driving 40+ mph, turned the corner and there they were, a couple walking along the side of the road in the path of my vehicle. I coulda killed them if there had been an oncoming car. I used to like to race other cars on the highway when I was in college, frequently went 100+ mph weaving in between the other cars on the highway. Fucking stupid. Now that I’m older I don’t go above 85 mph unless there are literally no cars near mine, and I slow back down as I approach other cars. I don’t try to race anybody, and if somebody comes parallel to my car as if they want to race, I hit the brakes.

bareback with a stripper in a strip joint

Craziest thing I ever did was me and my cousin got an old wooden knickerbocker class sailboat, we spent the whole winter fixing the boat painting, sanding, replacing rotten wood stringers, come Memorial Day 1968, we get to a marina on the north shore of Long Island, with very little actual seamanship knowledge we sail from Huntington Harbor to the Long Island sound, we’re going great moving at a pretty good clip about 9-10 knots, and out mast cracks directly in half, we’re just fucked, we spot a beach maybe 5-600 yards from where we’re at and decide to swim to safety towing our boat 4 hours later we’re still swimming, exhausted and still way off from the beach it’s starting to get dark, we climb back into the boat, five minutes later we spot a Nassau county police boat saved our asses big time they towed us into Great Neck Harbor probably 40 miles from where our mast broke, the following day I enrolled in the coast guard seamanship classes we were so lucky 17 years old and the only reason we didn’t drown was because we were too ignorant to know, what we didn’t know.

I agreed to meet Juice in person.

Smoking cigarettes. What stupid habit and awful waste of money. Buying a Jeep in the mid-2000s. Crap quality and overpriced. Buying VIPs at Rick's Cabaret on Bourbon St. There are no extras there.

@skibum609: I had no idea about black/dark/tans. I use to go to Boston a fair amount in the 1980s, I worked for Digital Equipment Corp DEC.

You know when I was a kid we to soap up the drive way and run water down it to play "slip and slide" What a stupid ass fucking thing to do. I remember hitting my head once doing it (may explain alot) and I'm surprised I didn't break anything doing it. Riding a bike without helmet as a kid (or else you get called a pussy) or even any age really but when you look at statistics biking is one of the most dangerous sports out there. Kids should not be doing it without helmet. I almost got hit by cars a bunch of times I was like a crazy adhd kid. I just figured adults would know better not to hit me.

As an 18 yo, tripping on mushrooms, stole a car from an impound lot. Full disclosure- It was my buddy’s car and I had his keys. Immediately got in a car chase with the police, jumped out of the car and ran into the woods. Never got caught! Cops questioned my buddy/owner of the car and he didn’t say shit - he was at work and he said he didn’t know who could have had his keys (I left them in the car when I ran) Also as a drunk teenager had sex with a girl at an out-of-town party in her bedroom (party was at her house) with a bunch of random people I didn’t know watching. Guess it was good the only person I knew at the part was the girl. She was hot and obviously a crazy slut. I saw her a few years later when she was married and was with her husband at another party. I went on a beer run and she volunteered to come along - without telling her husband we were leaving. Of course we were fucking in the car 5 minutes later. We went back to the party like nothing happened. I never saw her again but heard she left her husband / got divorced a few years later immediately after having a kid. The husband had full custody of the kid. She was a train wreck but sexy as hell.

Other than getting married?

When I was growing up, my friends, my brother and I used to ride laundry baskets down the stairs at my house, which may not have been too crazy until you consider the wall at the bottom of the stairs only about 3 feet across the landing. Not a few injuries were experienced across the years. I also was fond of jumping/diving off bridges, sometimes in areas where I was not familiar with the currents, water depth etc. Almost drowned once. Not the smartest thing in retrospect. I also once went boogie boarding with a friend in April in Massachusetts with a huge storm off the coast and gigantic waves coming in. Almost drowned that time too, got pulled under by the undertow and it took me well over a minute to get back above the surface. Plus I almost got hypothermia after we drifted in the current about two miles down the beach from where we lived and then had to walk back wet and freezing in 40 something degree weather. Now that I think of it, I guess I really wasn't the best decision maker when I was younger...

That reminds me of my cousin, we were playing lawn darts if you remember the 60s lawn darts were metal with a point nit those plastic ones with a suction cup on the end, well they started playing William Tell with the darts, my cousin so went first put the apple on his head, my other cousin threw the dart it went right into his forehead, needless to say our parents confiscated the dart game but fortunately the dart wasn’t in very deep so we just pulled it out and put a bandaid on it Damn I think we might have been 14 or 15 at the time.

Finding TUSCL web site years ago has accelerated my path to self destruction faster than any other singular event in my life.

Back in the late 60s early 70s I was in the merchant marine working as a Mate on freighters sailing to West Africa. On many occasions I would pick up a girl in a bar (I don't remember if money changed hands but probably yes), go to her room and eat her pussy and fuck BB. The best ones were in Monrovia and Abijan. They all had big hair wigs and and when they took the wigs off it was all in corn rows that they called their little hair. The chief mate would hand out some sort of antibiotic to take beforehand as a prophylactic (not a great idea). I came back from one trip and after we docked in Brooklyn I went to a doctor because I had a soar throat and thought I might have syphilis. The only doctor I could find near was and an OBGYN. I went into the waiting room filled with pregnant wearing my work khakis. It as weird but it was not syphilis.

I played a game with my teenage camping buddies where you shoot and arrow straight up, you loose sight of it, then scramble when it comes back in sight on its way down about 50 feet/2 seconds before it hits the ground or one of us idiots. Scary. Just last week I saw they did that in the Adam Sandler movie Grownups (1 or 2 maybe?). No one got hurt when we played it.

^ ha ha just saw Ski played the same stupid game

^ Yes - idiots - and 2 of my camping buddies were Eagle Scouts. 2 brothers and they were nuts

Seeing the dart stories above reminded me of another time growing up when in the basement of our house my best friend stuck a dart right in the back of my younger brother's head. I remember him running around screaming like it happened yesterday. I was literally on the floor rolling around laughing while my friend was yelling that it wasn't funny. Which of course only made me laugh harder. Good times man, good times.

1. 1998: Flying from Seoul to Bangkok for vacation (working in S.Korea), and smuggling a decent amount of shitty weed from Phuket back to Seoul via Bangkok. I freaked out AFTER going through customs in Seoul because I saw a German Shepherd, a submachine gun, and a beret......and flushed it all like a fucking idiot! The "heavy lifting" was already done, but I thought that dog might be trained to smell my weed (it wasn't). 2. Completing the "100 club" with Mickeys when I was 18 years old, 135lbs....and only two months of drinking under my belt. I guess I should have been taken to the hospital, but instead the solution was to gag me with a toothbrush to dry heave out some liquid. 3. Child one. 4. Child two. I jest. I guess......

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2AzAFqrxfeY SkiDumb doesn’t want to let anybody know the craziest shot he’s ever done, but if you watch this you tube clip, then you’ll know.

Many years ago, I was invited by a young attractive girl I met at a party to leave with her and go to her place for coffee. I told her that I couldn't because I needed to go to sleep when I get home and coffee would keep me awake. Her response as she stormed out of the party, "What's wrong with you? Your're getting fresh baked goods here!" And she didn't mean pastry.

One crazy thing I did was riding my bike down a steep, half mile long hill, no helmet. I reached 45 mph on several occasions attested to by my trusty Cadet speedometer! The real kicker was the stop sign at the base of the hill - my hand brakes were no match for my momentum, lol. I ended up making the right turn still doing about 15. Speed limit was 30🤣 Somehow, I survived that bit of poor decision making without a spill that would undoubtedly have broken bones and peeled the skin from my body. Funniest bicycle folly I ever saw was at a place where the paved road ended and the park started. I was always very careful there. My friend Peter wasn't and rode his front wheel into a depression that exactly matched the diameter of the wheel. If course, the front wheel immediately stopped while back half, and Peter, kept going. He performed a perfect, still seated, over the handlebars flip with (to my eyes) perfect landing on his back with the bike on top of him. His back was scraped to hell but that was the extent of his injuries, smh 🚴🏾‍♀️