Can't get emotional when they choose others, but can you feel good when they cho

"... you shouldn't take it as an ego boost when you know you've pulled a dancer away from other PLs right ..." Have never *consciously* thought about it like that, probably b/c I'm not one to lock down a dancer all for myself (like some guy I know in San Francisco but I won't name names :)) - but I guess there's a bit of a PL-boost when a dancer seems to prefer to dance for you over other PLs, but it's not something that really crosses my PL-mind

There appears to be a pecking order when it comes to who and when most dancers approach. It goes something like: 1. Old white guys 2. Middle age white guys 3. Groups 4. Everyone else I dont get any kicks out strippers picking me over other pl's. I couldnt care less, as i usually try to draw in multiple strippers, expecting half or more to not be bothered with me. You really should only get an ego boost if a stripper picks you over someone "above" you in the pecking order.

"You really should only get an ego boost if a stripper sleeps with you and you're not paying her' FTFY

Right. Also, it's better not to pride yourself on a dancer praising you as such a "gentleman" that you sit on your hands at two way contact clubs. Generalized: You seeking her approval is undesirable. Her seeking your approval is desirable.

No I do not get an ego boost from it, not even a little. It's a money game and if she is visiting me, it's first and foremost because she views me as a potential source of $$$. That's not to say that other factors don't play in. In my experience, making oneself approachable and easy to deal with (in a non-creepy way) definitely helps, all else being equal, but rarely will that help bridge a big perceived economic gap. For me, if any good feelings arise from the simple fact that a girl comes over, it is because she is a girl that I know and her arrival is a sign that my night may be about to get better in some way. But if it a girl I don't know, then it's just the opening gambit in what could go in any number of directions.

What RandomMember said. Thats the ultimate prize. Deep down inside, thats what we all want.

I like playing it both ways. The point of being in a strip club is to have the live like a stud fantasy and that all the strippers want your awesome dick. So to me yeah when a stripper doesn't choose me I play it off as her loss and don't care (LMAO or pretend not to care) and when she chooses me I see it as a validation of the same fantasy. She made an obvious wise choice. It's always about having a good time ITC, and since it is all a contrived fantasy anyway, I make the best of all that it is worth and try to live it always positively. There is no need to think negatively in a place of living your fantasy is my point.

Ha, that guy in SF, sounds like a standup guy. #1 choice to party with :) Agree with taxi_driver... if you just dig it a bit that she's coming over to you, there' no harm, and no reason for anyone to go into conniptions over it. Nearly anyone here who is CF/ATFing instead of a pure variety guy gets some enjoyment out of that type of behavior, that's often part of why they CF/ATF. That said, it's always good to do an honest gut check here... harmless little bit of enjoyment, or do you feel like you're the prince who just scored the belle of the ball?

I've had that happen to me once. There was this dancer that I really wanted but she stood at the bar most of the night. Anyhow at some point during the evening they lined up all of the dancers and then let them loose to work the room. That's when I got her attention and on our way to the VIP room, 3 other guys asked her for a dance. She had to decline because she was with me. Plus it felt good knowing that after we finished the session, she sat with me for another 10-15 minutes while there were a bunch of horny guys on the main floor waiting for her to come back out.

I think you can feel good when the girl selects you. I like to pick them myself. And if a girl picks me, I'll still find a way to turn it around and make her feel like I am screening her before I pick her. But yes, if she picks you, you should feel good. SJG The World Is A Ghetto https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptIcert_Ra8 Malo-Suavecito https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Y7zrudDdx8 Carlos Santana - Samba Pa Ti https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5AUm_xaE9A Say a guy last night had this Rolls-Royce in a parking lot. Not sure the model. May have been a phantom. Like this, but not the extended wheelbase: http://www.zercustoms.com/news/images/Rolls-Royce/Rolls-Royce-Phantom-Series-II-Extended-Wheelbase-2.jpg Do these cars really have wheel covers over steel rims? They have retractable hood ornaments. Not sure if it works by and electric motor or by vacuum. This one was parked, but still retracted. Not sure the guy turned a switch for that, or if something was broken. https://www.rolls-roycemotorcars.com/en-GB/phantom-swb.html

When someone as the power to make you feel good simply because she chose to sit with you, she. also has the power to elicit feelings of disappointment when she doesn't. These are two sides of the same coin. In fact, I think that these types of feelings are exactly why we must endure countless threads on here from PLs who feel the need to whine about everything from big spending regulars to anti-social girls to any number of other issues which lead to them being ignored by one girl or another. I'd normally say something like "sack up" when reading stuff like this, but I no longer see the point with a group like this.

^^^^^^^ And only the author of The System (tm) could offer such insightful commentary. Very well put. SJG

Damn @Subraman you just got slammed by @RickDugan and he’s right this time , just sayin ;)

two-five: okay, tune in sometime in late 2018 when I'll make my next mistake :)

I used to get all butt hurt when a dancer would walk past me and go to another PL in the room, especially if I had tipped her onstage and he had not. Now I just laugh at most strippers cluelessness when it comes to who they choose to approach. Sometimes it's a blessing in disguise.

I used to love it when a hot dancer asks for dances on an announced two for one rather than at regular prices.

I think you can get a boost from it. I like Papi’s term “PL boost.” Means you are doing something right as a pl, but not necessarily as a man. I’d take note and consider why she came over, so that you can maybe do it more.

I like that it cuts out some of the steps I would otherwise have to take. She's hoping you're horny and cash heavy. That's it.

I had a regular tell me that 3 guys were waiting to take her to VIP while she was just sitting with me. I then asked her "then why are you just sitting with me?" Her answer..."I know you have to leave soon and they will wait". Just a little insight into a stripper thought process.

magic: the fun thing here is to play the opposite scenarios. For example, my first thought was, "the entire thing was a clever fabrication on her part, to obligate you to spend more, and to create some false bonding of you to her. She invented the 3 guys waiting, and of course her explanation -- from which you can infer that you are her higher priority -- is pretty flattering". I think girls do things like this all the time. Or, the guy(s) waiting is really just some rando who wants to throw a $20 at her; of course she's sticking with you. On the other hand, we can also take this at face value: there really were 3 guys waiting, but you're a regular of hers so she doesn't want to burn you, plus, she knows those guys will wait anyway. The lesson I personally take away from this: validation that I am not the sort of PL who waits, since being easy this way just encourages the stripper to take her time to get to me. Exactly the lesson that Papi hoped I wouldn't learn :)

Subraman.....you are exactly right on your last paragraph. I told her I wouldn't wait around if I were one of them and of course she said, "I know you wouldn't". It didn't cause me to spend any more or less on her

I found out a long time ago that in going to strip clubs, you can't walk in expecting girls to supply emotional affirmation. You have to instead walk in thinking, "What can I do to make them feel good?". SJG

Just came back from the club. A favorite of mine started at 2:00pm and the last time I was there, we shook hands on a "dance date" for 2pm today. I got there at 2:01pm and she was already making her rounds for another dance from someone else. See even saw me, smiled and then proceeded to hit up other guys for dances first, one of which bit. I had to wait but I had no hard feelings as I knew she would get to me. My other favorite saw me when she got on stage 15 minutes after the first girl went back with another PL. I figured this second favorite would rush me after her stage performance, but ended up waiting 1.75 hours. Again, I wasn't butt-hurt about this. These two girls know I always get dances from them and know that I am usually at the club for 2 to 2.5 hours a visit, so they can try to hustle dances from other guys in the meantime. One day, it might bite them in the ass if I decide to test drive someone else while they are taking their time, but I am not at that point yet. I go to the club to relax and see boobies, so when they get to me, they get to me.

^ IMO a regular should have priority - I think they are taking you for granted if not even disrespecting your patronage

^ especially since the first-dancer knew you were coming to see *her*

^ she must see PL written on your forehead :)

@orange I would have been long gone you need to find those testicles maybe you left them in your car.

Meh, I don't feel disrespected. I'm guessing the first one forgot that we had a dance appointment. This club has so many hot girls though, that if they inadvertently booked a PL ahead of me and that PL ended up doing a shit-ton of dances and monopolized her/their time, I still have plenty of good options to go with. There are a few day shift hotties I haven't tried out yet, one of which I finally got to go back with today in between the two girls I specifically went to see.

I also look at it this way. At my job in a professional industry, it is not uncommon for me to have 10-20 clients simultaneously asking me to focus on or answer questions regarding their real estate projects. I am only 1 person and can only do 1 thing at a time, so I am constantly triaging my work load. There is no dis-respect to anyone, but sometimes you just need to pick which fire to put out first. It is kind of like "keeping the plates spinning"; strippers have to do it too with us. I guess I am just more easy going.

^ if the other PLs are also regulars or the dancers had reached an agreement w/ them prior to your arrival, then IMO no biggie - but if they keep going to other PLs and leaving you for last then that's being PL-dissed

orange: the other way to look at this -- and, in fact, the way I personally look at it is -- did you get the experience you wanted at the strip club? If waiting for 1.75 hours getting ignored by one fave and forgotten by the other, but you're proud of yourself because you can prove you're an evolved post-modern man and not butthurt, is the experience you're after -- hey, perfect. I have a buddy who hits on the waitress -- I don't understand him, just like I don't understand you, but if you're both getting the experiences you want, who am I to say you're going wrong. Okay, I'm being a little snarky but you get the point -- in the end, you're getting an experience you're happy with, or not. You think you're being recognized and treated for the value you bring as a customer, or not. If you were my SC wingman, I'd be congratulating you on not getting histrionic or butthurt, but I'd also be asking you if instead of getting recognized for the value you bring as a regular, you're making it easy to step all over you, and trying to justify that with all kinds of questionable explanations...

I planned to be at the club for 2.5 hours. Having 1 put me off for 20 minutes and another for 1.75 hours spreads my fun out. Each one got me off with an HJ. Had I did them back to back right away, I would not have gotten a second pop and would of been out of dance money within an hour. In between them, I took back a 3rd girl I had never gotten dances from too. She pumped me for 20 straight minutes but my second pop wasn't ready yet. You guys are missing that I was not in a rush to get my dances. Conversely, on past visits I've my 3 favorites all descend on me back to back to back and have had to tell them to come back in 1 or 1.5 hours so I can recuperate. Today, I did 15 dances @ 4 minutes each via 3 girls. I have no issue with that hour's worth of time being spread over 2.5 total hours.

If you're a variety guy who is just as happy playing the field, I get that more

If I find a dancer to be hot - and dance-worthy - and if she decides to dance for me - then I’m happy to enjoy her company (and services). I’m not clubbing to compete with other pl’s. I’m clubbing to enjoy myself. My current situation might be very different from pl’s with cf’s - as they are more tied to a certain dancer. I’m going to see what’s available - and who can fill my desires. If a dancer isn’t interested - I can usually determine that quickly - which saves me time and money.

@ Subraman: If it makes you feel any better, today I kiddingly asked the stripper who I had a 2pm dance date yesterday why she didn't come directly over to me when she saw me arrive a minute late. She said she had punched in early and had already danced on stage, so she was completing her tip walk for the guys that watched her dance. She make sure that I was aware that she came to me directly after one of the guys who saw her dance finished his LD session with her (which she did).